a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Randomize
