so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
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