so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
