I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
