week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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