What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize