Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
