wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
is that a dick in a sweater?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
