yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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