4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
