Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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