I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Randomize