I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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