I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
