What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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