Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
