I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
