I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
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