dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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