I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You're like the curious george of whores
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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