yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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