we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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