he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
