We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Randomize
