she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
