come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
