p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
