Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
