In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
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