So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
