You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
