I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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