then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
