i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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