i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
