I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Randomize
