you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
