He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize