Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
NoShamevember. You game?
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
