Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize