I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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