After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
