i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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