Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
