The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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