Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
