I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
