I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
We need to rekindle our bromance
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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