Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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