I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
