She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
