I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
