my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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