lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Randomize
